Monday, December 10, 2007

Nearly Gone

She is a garbage bag
stuffed with clothes
at the end of a hallway.

6 comments:

writerwoman said...

There is a coldness in this poem. It reminds me of divorce. Remarkable that you can convey so much in one sentence.

Ario said...

So forlorn. As Writerwoman says, so few words used to such great effect. What I also always like in your work is that you never resort to cliché - your choice of words - as is evident here - always remains new. Quite a feat.

Brian said...

Sara - yeah much like divorce indeed.

Ario - i think it's interesting that you bring up cliche. I think it's something that all writers struggle with at times, including myself. I try to stick to describing the things around me. It seems also in your writing that you write a lot about your own observations and experiences

Anna said...

It really hit me! Left so many pictures and possiblities.

Anonymous said...

Such an image of cool detachment. I feel relationship reduced to impersonal. Trash. Finito. I love the way you get to the heart of the matter, Brian..:) Kudos, and a cartwheel!


janetleigh

reluctantscribe said...

Which is probably why I like your work so much. It looks deceptively simple, but it's hard to describe one's observations and experiences in language that is clear and new. You do it very well. I also like the brevity of your work. It paradoxically lends the poetry a depth that larger poems by others may lack.

Yet I remain curious as to what a larger poem by you may be like. I think Scott mentioned that a little while back.

Anyway, hope you have recovered well and are having a good holiday season. All the best,

Ario