Friday, April 25, 2008

A paperless sky

The faint unraveling
of tears
unlozenged
and descending.

I watch
as a poster of sky
detaches from the ceiling
and falls between us

8 comments:

wordcrafter said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
wordcrafter said...

I love this very succinct, very vivid description. The various layers in the "sky detaches"; the literal illusory sight of a patch of sky seen through tears, and, the metaphor for the collapse of dreams. Brief and perfect.
http://owlnights.blogspot.com/

Noah The Great said...

Oh wow, this is intense.

janetleigh said...

What wordcrafter said. It's amazing to me how you "see" things, Brian. Everything you write is so vivid in meaning using an economy of words. I think this is one of your best, truly. Hope you're doing well..:)

p.s. I really appreciate that you've changed your "Comment page" set-up. It's so easy for me now. Thanks so much and I hope it wasn't a hassle to do.

ozymandiaz said...

feelin like chickin little?

Anna said...

Hi, I have a new poetry site and was wondering if you would like to exchange links.

I have added your link here:

Online Poetry Blogs

And my site is:

Poem Poem Poem

I have also created a blog where you can register and publish your own poems and stories. I would love to have your contributions if you are so inclined. The blog is

Poems and Stories


Thanks and I hope to see you there.

- Anna

Jade said...

pretty write.

astrobassist said...

I love the second stanza. This happened to me, actually, only the poster was john coltrane.